Weigh In Wednesday - Week 9

I really hope I lose. My cousin was here over the weekend and I took off Monday so I wasn't perfect (helloooo 3 cupcakes.) but, I think I did okay. I mostly counted and I don't think I even used all my extra points (okay, maybe the cupcakes). I ate a turkey sandwich at a burger place (I did have fries though) and got a salad the next day for lunch (the BEST salad, but I stuffed myself with said salad even though I knew I shouldn't).

So, I may not be losing 6lbs by the end of Spring Challenge. Oh well. This Challenge has NOT had the desired effect on my motivation. I feel too pressured and start to give up.


Okay. Just got back from weigh in. To refresh your memory:

Week 1: Starting weigh in

Week 2: -.6

Week 3: -3.4

Week 4: -1.0

Week 5: +1.2

Week 6: -1.2

Week 7: 0

Week 8: +1.4

Week 9: -2.6

Total lost = 7.4

I should really stop writing half of these posts BEFORE I weigh in. I LOST 2.6 POUNDS. Now, I need to be careful not to "reward" myself for doing well. Note to self: cupcakes are not a reward for weightloss.

I guess the moral today is - stick to it and don't give up even when you screw it up a little...or a lot.

Short Post

Basically I'm tired, my diet got screwed up (again, my fault but I don't want to talk about it), and I'm having trouble with my stupid stupid credit card.

I took off work yesterday so I'm trying to catch up on all my stuff. It sucks a little bit.

I'll be back tomorrow with Weigh In Wednesday.

Sticking to It (and a car story)

I'm doing well this week. I've only used a couple points of my 49 for my weekly lunch with the hubs. I WILL lose weight this week. I will.

Also, I really suck at blogging. I want to be all honest and real with you, but.... I can't keep on topic for more than 5 seconds. Luckily no one really reads my little blog, so I guess it doesn't matter right now. *sigh* so I'll just bounce around.

We bought a washer and dryer yesterday, but it'll be April 24th before it's delivered. I suck at waiting. It's a simple toploading HE washer and matching dryer with autodry functions. Spent $1035 when all was said and done. I wanted something fancier, but I just couldn't justify a fancy HE with all the electronic features for a couple hundred more right now. We probably could have held out indefinitely with the ancient washer/dryer we have now, but my best friend is moving into her first grown up house and needed a washer/dryer. I knew I'd be upgrading soon so I offered her mine. It kinda stuck me in a bind after my car decided to be a bitch, but I can't mess up someone else's plan so I just sucked it up and figured it out.

I've also got a plan to buy myself a new car in September as a birthday present to myself. My car (Champ) hates me for some reason. He was fantastic (okay, there was this one time that his fuel sensor broke and he was almost impossible to drive because his shifting was so jerky and my mom got really mad because my dad made her bring Champ home 2 and a half hours away doing that. That was only $50 when all was said and done though) then, sometime last year he just....broke. The A/C went out. It was the tail end of summer, so I figured I could hold out and get it fixed before next summer. A day later (an hour and a half away from home) the engine just... stopped. I stopped at a stop sign and it died. I restarted it, and it died, I got it start barely enough to coast into a parking spot downtown where I was. I missed class so I could call a tow truck, had to stay with a friend because I couldn't afford to tow it all the way back home and was told they couldn't even FIND what was wrong with it because the A/C belt was locked up and if they forced it to keep running it would snap the belt.... so fix the A/C for $1200 when that may just be one thing that is wrong with it, or.... be up shit creek. My parents paid for the A/C because I was still in college. Luckily, for whatever reason the A/C was the root of all the problems. I even asked my mechanic if it was my fault. Should I have come in when my A/C stopped working? I just thought I could be hot for awhile and still drive the car. His reply was that he'd never seen that happen. Oooookay. Then Champ was okay for a little bit, then he wouldn't start. I spent 30 minutes in a Kohl's parking lot trying to get him started and drove him straight to my mechanic when he did start. I don't even remember what was wrong with him, but something got replaced. $300. Then I take him in to get the brakes pads changed and an oil change. Oh. My. God. The brake pads have squealed since I bought that damn car. I hate them. They continued to tell me they were fine, just noisy. I was paranoid that I wouldn't hear the actual squeal when they needed to be replaced so I made them check them every time I got the oil changed. I saved up some money and finally just told them to change the damn things because I hate them and don't care if they still have enough surface. Well, they resurface the rotors when they change break pads and there wasn't enough surface anymore from previous resurfacing so they would need to be replaced. $300. Oil change $100 (synthetic oil) I had a hydraulic leak on the back breaks. Apparently this is really bad. I could have complete system failure in a day, or it could work for the next 10 years. Should be replaced NOW. My parents had to step in, again, and pay my $680 bill. And that's not all the shit that was wrong! I knew I needed a new pair of tires $300 but there was at least $500 more of work that needs to be done on this car. I'm so done. Between now and September I'll be changing the oil once and then trading in Champ for whatever he's worth (or not worth as the case probably is) and moving on with a NOT BROKEN CAR.
It's not even fair. I'm so nice to my cars. I drive them a lot, but I get the oil changed regularly. I always put the same oil in there. Any time something feels weird I take him to the mechanic. I get the tires changed regularly. And I get fucked.
My husband gets his oil changed like twice a year with non synthetic oil, has needed new tires for over a year, never takes his car in, and probably needs new brakes and his car just RUNS.
The thing that sucks is this car is supposed to be like, the most reliable runs no matter what car. I've had mechanics tell me if I keep taking care of it the way I do it'll run forever.... I don't know what the fuck is wrong with you Champ, but fuck you.

Weigh In Wednesday - Week 8

I didn't have high hopes for this Weigh In Wednesday. Like I said on Monday, Easter blew my diet and it doesn't help that the Spring Challenge is having the opposite effect on my weight loss than I anticipated. I'm stressed out about not doing well enough that any time I screw up I get really depressed and start eating like shit. It's the worst thing I could do to myself for weight loss, and yet I keep doing it day after day.

So, that's why I didn't think I'd lose any weight from last week when I held steady at -6.2 total lbs.

Week 1: Starting weigh in

Week 2: -.6

Week 3: -3.4

Week 4: -1.0

Week 5: +1.2

Week 6: -1.2

Week 7: 0

Week 8: +1.4

Total lost = 4.8
It's okay. I'll do better next week. I'm going to work REALLY hard. I promise.


Now, a rant about my week.It's been rough. I'm feeling like my master's degree and passing the CPA exam (won't be a CPA until my year of supervision is done) were worth nothing to this company. I'm stuck on the same level in the same job as people with a bachelor's degree.... but I still need the same 3 years of "experience" to get a promotion. Basically until I want to be a controller, my CPA is unnecessary. It's very disheartening, but to make it worse I'm in the ONE department I knew from the get go I didn't want to be in. I'm an audit major for a reason. I don't enjoy tax. Tax makes my head hurt. I'm not naturally good at tax, and even when I'm putting everything I have into it I'm slow and barely at par. Now I'm going to be here for an extra 2 months. I thought I was 2 months away from leaving this department, now I'm only halfway through my stint. 8 months. 8 months in hell where the qualifications are made up and the degrees don't matter......

See what I did there? ha. I need to be more positive or I'm never going to get through this. It's just hard not to want to crawl under my desk and hide from the world. I hate everything, and when I don't I have a hard time feeling anything. I fake smile and interact with people. I try to act like a normal person. I think I get it right, but it takes a lot out of me and there  seems to be no end in sight. I just need an end in sight.

Easter Blew My Diet

I really felt like I did okay, but I didn't track over Easter. I'm now -15 weekly points. Not awful, but I probably can't workout enough by Wednesday to counteract that. *sigh*
BUT I didn't eat ANY chocolate or Easter candy (some strawberry pound cake and key lime pie were my downfall). Small wins.

I'm still hoping for a little weight loss this week. I held at zero last Wednesday but if I want to make my Spring Challenge goal of 6 lbs in 6 weeks, I need to start losing a little over a pound a week.

Okay, short post today. Trying to get caught up from being off on Friday!

Weigh In Wednesday - Week 7

I'm a day late, but I don't weigh in until noon at my weekly meeting, so I forgot.
Anyways, I'm holding steady.

Week 1: Starting weigh in

Week 2: -.6

Week 3: -3.4

Week 4: -1.0

Week 5: +1.2

Week 6: -1.2

Week 7: 0

All in all, I'm happy with that. I splurged more than I should have. Not exactly what I wanted going into Easter weekend, but I'm determined to be good and only splurge with my 49 points. 

Speaking of, it's a holiday tomorrow. We're going all the way to Arkansas. I actually really hate busy weekends. They make the week back feel so much worse. But, it'll be good to see the hubs parents. 

Spring Challenge - Day 1

My goals for today specifically - drink 100 oz of water - log food - journal.
The water thing is going to be the hardest. That's 5.55 of my water bottle. I average about 2 a day. Should have done the math last week and started slowly increasing. And also bought a new bite valve for my camelback. I'm using a knockoff type camelback water bottle, and I HATE not having the bite valve. Oh well. Maybe I'll order a replacement tonight, because I think my camelback is also bigger and so less refills which is psychologically pleasing.

As of noon I've drank an entire bottle of water. This is not looking good.

We also got our team challenges for the first 2 weeks. The first? Attending group classes. I want to go to group classes, but the only one's I can go to are during lunch...which is very stressful for me. I don't want to be sweaty, so I'll have to rinse off after. No big deal, we have showers, but what if there are a ton of people waiting? What if I have to stand around in a towel after? I'm too self conscious to do that. One of these days I'm going to force myself to go, but I'm not ready yet. Next week is better, it's  walking/running/rowing distance. It has to be in or around our gym. Which makes me remember that I forgot to update my ipod. It still has all of 20 songs on it from my wedding. Shoot.

This probably sounds like I'm just going to be complaining about the Spring Challenge the entire time. I hope not, but I have trouble with team sports. (okay, this is not a sport, give me a second). I feel like if I would have just moved faster, hit the ball harder, or in general been better we would have won. So, I stress about everything.